Microstiff - Microsoft Outings of the Third Kind

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Microstiff - The First Annual "Stiffie Award" goes to "The Peter Principle" (or at least Microsoft's version of it)

Commenter to the Mini-Microsoft site said:

dude, its tough managing a large corp. There is no way in Heaven (ABM) or on Earth (IAM) that inside will generate the creative results you want.

Corps, governments, HR flunkies (sorry Lisa, but you are only as good as the structure you prop up) all have reached their Peter Principled Level of Perfection which destroys individuals and unique solutions, which is exactly what Microsoft needs right now."

Ah, yes, the good old Peter Principle. Thanks for reminding us, dude. Nice alliteration! “Peter Principled Level of Perfection.” Of course, the Peter Principle is about reaching one’s level of incompetence but, alliteration demanded and dude delivered…the alliterative... "Perfection". “Yah see… (spoken like John Stewart doing George Bush) it's because, here at Microsoft, incompetence IS perfection...at least in the management ranks. Yah see?”

But, it’s not the incompetence that destroys individuals and unique solutions; it’s the willingness to REMAIN incompetent. It's what Dr. Scott Peck of "Road Less Traveled" fame calls the "militant ignorance." In other words: Stupidly, stubbornly, continually, denyingly ignoring the facts. Can you think of some examples present in our current political climate? Yah see? How does this relate to Microsoft: Well, IMO, Softies weren’t hired as incompetents; they had to GET THAT WAY! It’s the CULTURE of incompetence that promotes the BEHAVIOR of incompetence. It’s become a habit, primarily at the management levels. But, that’s ALL it is…HABIT. Yah see?

So, there is hope and it comes from on high. That very small group of MSFT managers who, unknowingly or not, promote and cultivate incompetence can likewise...kill it! Let’s use LisaB, as an example:

LisaB has the power to begin to turn the ship around almost immediately. How? Simply stop using employees as HR guinea pigs by requiring the embarrassing notification to current managers of the desire to interview internally; a system that is unnatural, at best, and unusable at worst. A system that promotes departmental incompetence by causing good employees to either depressingly stagnate their own human spirits in their current positions or look outside of Microsoft to nurture that spirit! Either way, Microsoft loses, yah see! (Wow, that's pretty heady stuff - "either way, Microsoft loses." Would make rational men and women wanna stop what they're doin' and...well...do what it takes to...win.)

And, so why not check in with your boss, Lisa, and then take this one small step for the employees and one giant leap for Microsoft and ELIMINATE PERMISSION-BASED INTERNAL INTERVIEWING altogether? Honestly, I wish I were in Lisa’s position to take such a bold yet simple step to bring so much good to 71,000 employees! It’d be a no brainer to me – no money, no costly program administration just a simple announcement. Yah see?

Mini-Microsoft: Microsoft Internal Transfers Just Got a Whole Lot Easier

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