Microstiff - Microsoft Outings of the Third Kind

Friday, March 09, 2007

Microstiff-Friday Again...Time for F. N. Stoopit!

"Duh, hi, again! It's Friday, March 9, and here's my big 'ol rant: A big Duh-mbo! Award goes out to duh-what you guys at the Softie have been calling "LIVE". I heard that there's a whole passel of things

F. N. Stoopit!

you call "LIVE" down there in Redmond. In fact, everything that's got a name down there, you added that word "Live" to it; am I right?

Windows got Windows Live, Office got Office Live (I hear that Office Live isn't even bout Microsoft Office!), OneCare Live (which is some sort of way to give support to people and...it isn't even ONLINE...which means Live...to me!) I heard that-duh free towel program you've got down there is called Towel Live and...listen to this...they're cooking up a plan to call Windows Live...Windows Live Live to make it more live than them ones that ain't actually...that...live...like OneCare Live. Hey, based on what's come before it...it makes sense to me! You?

To me, L-I-V-E means "here", "right now". If I'm watching Saturday Night Live it's "here", "right now". If it's one of those reepeets, then at least I know it was live when folks were watching for the first time.

Now I've heard that you're firing all those big wigs associated with the "Live" program. I bet they're all feeling like getting fired is "here", "right now" aren't they! Where I come from you couldn't get much more LIVE than getting fired! In fact, my uncle, Billy Bubba Bob "Crawdaddy" Crawford was fired from the post office the other day. It was done Live and so was the rounds of buckshot he pumped into the front of the Post Office trailer!

Anyway, I've got solution to all this Live stuff. All the information we're looking for is in one of three (3) places. The server down the hall, the computer on my desktop and the place they call the Cloud...which is sort like the server down a longer hall. That way, if the programs you want are on the server down the hall, you call it Server Services. If they're on your Desktop, you call it Desktop Services and...if they're in the Clouds, you call it what? That's right...Cloud Services!

But that'd be way to simple so...you know the Softie isn't gonna do that. Softie don't play that!

Update:
Now I heard that they're giving "Live" over to the "Windows" boys; you know the "cash cow with shrinking hooters"! How the hell are THEY gonna make things happen? They can't get Vista right! Dang...everybody including my dog "Ubuntu" knows that!

"That's all I got. See you next Friday!"

P.S. - "You know, I swear, it still just doesn't make any sense to me that a company with 70,000 folks a shuffling around down there couldn't ask one or two of them what they should name this stuff.

"But...I'm the only one that's F. N. Stoopit!...right?"



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Mini-Microsoft: Stop Him Before He Speaks Again!

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